37 Lessons from 300+ Tech Job Offers
What we've learned from negotiating $15M+ in increases.
Recruiters negotiate for a living. You don’t.
If you go into salary discussions without a strategy, you’re handing over control before the conversation even starts. Annie Murray and I have spent years on both sides of the table: hiring at top tech companies and helping candidates secure 5, 6, even 7-figure increases.
This video breaks down 37 lessons we’ve learned from negotiating 300+ job offers. Find the written summary of our discussion below.
Next Step: Learn It Live
We’re running free, no-fluff negotiation workshops to help you apply these strategies in real time. Pick the session that fits your situation. Or better yet, attend all of them.
📌 Handling Salary Expectations Questions (Tue, Mar 18 @ 6:00pm PST)
📌 Negotiating Startup Offers (Sat, Mar 22 @ 9:00am PST)
📌 Negotiating Big Tech Offers (Wed, Mar 26 @ 11:00am PST)
📌 Mock Negotiation Practice with Annie (Tue, Apr 8 @ 5:30pm PST)
Lesson 1: Recruiters Are Trained To Negotiate
Recruiters are not simply facilitators; they are often trained professionals with specific negotiation strategies. They understand common candidate responses, and they have tactics to influence your decisions. It's important to recognize that while they may want to fill the position, their role involves negotiating the best possible outcome for the company. Being aware of this training helps you anticipate their strategies and prepare your own.
Lesson 2: Don't Fear Negotiations
Don't let fear prevent you from negotiating. Many candidates avoid negotiation due to concerns about jeopardizing the job offer. However, negotiation is a standard practice in the tech industry, and companies often expect it. With the right approach and preparation, the risk of losing an offer is often low. Fear can lead you to leave money on the table, so it's essential to overcome it.
Lesson 3: Negotiating is Expected
Companies generally anticipate candidates will negotiate. It's not seen as aggressive or unusual; in fact, it's a standard part of the hiring process. Companies often build negotiation ranges into their compensation plans. Failing to negotiate may signal a lack of confidence or an unfamiliarity with industry norms. Embracing this expectation empowers you to advocate for your worth.
Lesson 4: Embrace Discomfort
Negotiation can be uncomfortable, but this discomfort often indicates you are advocating effectively for yourself. If you feel too comfortable, you might not be pushing hard enough to achieve your goals. It's a sign that you're stretching beyond your comfort zone, which is often necessary to secure a favorable outcome. Discomfort is a natural part of the process, and accepting it can lead to better results.
Lesson 5: Negotiating Improves Your Reputation
Professional negotiation can enhance your reputation and demonstrate valuable skills to potential employers. When done correctly, it showcases your ability to communicate effectively, advocate for yourself, and understand your value. Hiring managers often respect candidates who negotiate confidently and professionally. It can set a positive tone for your future interactions within the company.
Lesson 6: Negotiate Your Level
In addition to salary, consider negotiating the job level or title to ensure it aligns with your experience and career goals. Sometimes, a higher title can open doors to more opportunities and higher compensation in the future. It's a crucial aspect of negotiation that goes beyond immediate financial gains. Negotiating your level demonstrates your ambition and long-term vision.
Lesson 7: Uplevels Anchor Compensation
Achieving a higher job level can significantly influence your overall compensation and future earning potential. Companies often have salary bands associated with different levels, so securing a higher level can lead to a substantial increase in your earning power. It also establishes a higher anchor for future salary negotiations and career growth.
Lesson 8: Title Isn't Everything
While titles are important, evaluate the entire opportunity, including company growth, reputation, and overall compensation potential. Don't fixate solely on the title; consider the bigger picture and the long-term impact on your career. Sometimes, a less prestigious title at a high-growth company can provide greater opportunities for advancement and financial gain.
Lesson 9: Step-Downs for Long-Term Gains
Sometimes, accepting a slightly lower title or position can lead to greater long-term career advancement and earning potential. This strategy is particularly relevant when transitioning between different types of companies (e.g., startup to FAANG). A temporary step-down can provide access to better opportunities, resources, and career growth in the long run.
Lesson 10: Don't Give A Number
Do not disclose your salary expectations prematurely in the negotiation process. It's crucial to gather more information about the role, the company's compensation structure, and your own value in the current market before discussing salary. Providing a number too early can limit your negotiating power and potentially undersell your worth.
Lesson 11: Protect Information
Control the flow of information during negotiations. Information is a valuable asset, so be mindful of what information you share and when. Avoid giving away unnecessary details that could weaken your negotiating position. Be prepared to answer questions strategically and thoughtfully.
Lesson 12: You Never Know If Your Number Is High Enough
You might be able to negotiate a higher offer than you initially expect. Companies often have some flexibility in their compensation packages. Don't assume the first offer is the final offer. Research salary ranges for similar roles and be prepared to justify your request for a higher compensation.
Lesson 13: Prepare For Aggressive Recruiter Tactics
Be prepared for recruiters to use various negotiation tactics, and develop strategies to address them. Recruiters may use techniques like creating a sense of urgency, emphasizing other candidates, or downplaying your contributions. Understanding these tactics allows you to remain calm and focused during negotiations.
Lesson 14: Show the Best Photo of the House
Focus on highlighting your strengths and the value you bring to the company. Emphasize your accomplishments, skills, and how you can contribute to the company's success. Present yourself as a highly desirable candidate and clearly articulate the value you bring to the team.
Lesson 15: Framing Other Opportunities
When discussing other job opportunities, present them in a way that maximizes your leverage. You can use competing offers or interest from other companies to demonstrate your value and create a sense of urgency. However, be honest and avoid exaggerating your situation.
Lesson 16: Interviews Can Be Better Than Offers
Early-stage opportunities can be used effectively as leverage in negotiations. Even if you don't have a formal offer from another company, expressing interest from other potential employers can strengthen your negotiating position. It indicates that you are in demand and have options.
Lesson 17: Control The Narrative
Maintain a consistent and compelling narrative throughout the negotiation process. Your story should align with your career goals and demonstrate why you are a strong fit for the role. Consistency and clarity in your communication are essential for building trust and credibility.
Lesson 18: Beyond Base Salary
Consider all components of the compensation package, including equity, bonuses, and benefits, not just base salary. Total compensation encompasses more than just your base salary. Explore and negotiate other elements like equity, signing bonuses, performance bonuses, benefits, and perks. A holistic approach will help you maximize your overall compensation.
Lesson 19: Don't Underestimate Equity
Equity can be a significant part of your overall compensation, especially in startups or high-growth companies. Understand the equity structure, vesting schedule, and potential value of the equity offered. Equity aligns your interests with the company's success and can provide substantial financial upside in the future.
Lesson 20: Negotiate Equity Protections
In addition to the amount of equity, negotiate terms that protect your equity in various circumstances. This can include things like accelerated vesting in case of acquisition or change of control, or extended exercise windows for stock options. These protections ensure that you are fairly compensated for your contributions, even if unforeseen events occur.
Lesson 21: Pre-Negotiate Severance/Separation
Discuss and negotiate severance or separation terms before accepting a job offer. While it might feel uncomfortable to discuss the possibility of leaving before you even start, it's a responsible and proactive step. Having a clear severance agreement in place provides security and clarity in case of unexpected circumstances.
Lesson 22: Stop Talking
Silence can be a powerful tactic in negotiations, encouraging the other party to provide more information or make concessions. After receiving an offer, pausing before responding can prompt the recruiter to elaborate or improve the offer. It's a way to create space and allow the other party to fill it.
Lesson 23: Step Back Under Pressure
Don't feel pressured to accept an offer immediately. It's essential to take time to review and consider all aspects of the offer, including compensation, benefits, and the overall opportunity. Rushing into a decision can lead to overlooking important details or accepting less than you deserve.
Lesson 24: They're Just Psychological Manipulation Tactics
Be aware of common psychological manipulation tactics used in negotiations. Recruiters may use techniques such as creating artificial deadlines, emphasizing other candidates, or downplaying your contributions. Recognizing these tactics allows you to remain objective and avoid being pressured into making a hasty decision.
Lesson 25: Kill Them with Kindness - Excitement Sandwich
Even when faced with aggressive tactics, maintain a professional and positive demeanor. Respond calmly and confidently, focusing on the facts and your value. Avoid getting drawn into emotional responses, as this can weaken your position.
Lesson 26: Be Likable
Being likable can significantly influence the outcome of negotiations. Building rapport and maintaining a positive relationship with the recruiter and hiring manager can make them more willing to work with you and meet your requests. Likability fosters a collaborative environment, even during negotiation.
Lesson 27: Be Neutral But Excited On The Offer Call
On the call where you receive the offer, express excitement about the opportunity but remain neutral about the offer itself. This approach allows you to acknowledge the offer positively without committing to it or revealing your immediate reaction. It sets the stage for further discussion and negotiation.
Lesson 28: Don't Negotiate When You Receive An Offer
Do not begin negotiating the offer during the call where it is presented. Instead, express gratitude and request time to review the offer thoroughly. This allows you to gather your thoughts, research, and prepare a well-reasoned counter-offer.
Lesson 29: Buy Time To Plan Your Counter Offer
Take time after receiving the offer to plan and prepare your counter-offer strategy. Research salary ranges, gather data to support your requests, and determine your priorities. A well-prepared counter-offer demonstrates your professionalism and strengthens your negotiating position.
Lesson 30: Get the Hiring Manager On Your Side
Having the hiring manager as an advocate can significantly strengthen your negotiation position. Building a strong rapport with the hiring manager and demonstrating your enthusiasm for the role can encourage them to support your requests. Their advocacy can be invaluable when negotiating with the company.
Lesson 31: 30-60-90 Action Plan Call
Have a conversation with the hiring manager about your plans for the role to demonstrate your understanding and commitment. Discussing your 30-60-90 day plan or your vision for the role can showcase your initiative and enthusiasm. It also provides an opportunity to align your goals with the team's objectives.
Lesson 32: Involve Your Skip Manager
In some cases, involving the skip manager (the hiring manager's manager) can be beneficial. The skip manager may have more authority to approve higher compensation or make exceptions to company policies. This is a tactic to consider if you're encountering roadblocks with the hiring manager or recruiter.
Lesson 33: Ride The Momentum Of The Negotiation
Time your counter-offer to capitalize on the momentum and enthusiasm of the hiring team. There's often a peak in excitement after successful interviews, and it's advantageous to make your counter-offer while that enthusiasm is high. Delaying too long can allow that momentum to fade.
Lesson 34: Warm Up Cold Negotiations
If there are delays in the negotiation process, re-engage with your advocates to maintain their support. Stay in touch with the hiring manager and recruiter, providing updates and reiterating your interest in the role. This keeps you top-of-mind and ensures that your advocates continue to support your requests.
Lesson 35: Internal Leverage Is Gold
Internal support within the company can be a significant advantage in negotiations. Having advocates like the hiring manager or skip manager on your side can greatly increase your chances of success. Building these relationships is a valuable aspect of the negotiation process.
Lesson 36: Don't Let Fear Drive Decisions
Do not let fear dictate your negotiation strategy or decisions. Fear can lead to missed opportunities and accepting less than you deserve. Approach negotiations with confidence and a clear understanding of your value.
Lesson 37: Avoid Offers Being Pulled
Negotiate in a way that minimizes the risk of the offer being withdrawn. While it's rare for offers to be rescinded, it's important to be professional and respectful throughout the negotiation process. Avoid making unreasonable demands or being overly aggressive, as this could potentially jeopardize the offer.
Quick reminder: If you have any questions about negotiating or want feedback on your approach, sign up for one of our free live workshops below:
Handling Salary Expectations Questions (Tue, Mar 18 @ 6:00pm PST)
Negotiating Startup Offers (Sat, Mar 22 @ 9:00am PST)
Negotiating Big Tech Offers (Wed, Mar 26 @ 11:00am PST)
Mock Negotiation Practice with Annie (Tue, Apr 8 @ 5:30pm PST)
See you there!
Negotiating soon?